Ernie Els Scoffs at Losers

Hillary Clinton called Bill into her office one day and said, "Bill, I have a great idea! I know how we can win back middle America and secure my presidential victory in 2008".

"Great, but how so you propose we go about that?", asked Bill "Well", Hillary responds, "We'll go down to a local Wal-Mart, get some cheezy clothes and shoes, like most middle Americans wear and then we'll stop at the pound and pick up a Golden Retreiver. When we look the part we'll go to a nice old country bar in middle America, and we'll show them that we really enjoy the Countryside and show admiration and respect for the hard working people living there .

A few days later, all decked out and with the requisite Retreiver at heel, they set off from New York in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at just the place they were looking for with dog in tow they walk into the bar. They step up to the bar and the Bartender takes a step back and say's, " Aren't you Bill and Hillary Clinton?"  Hillary answers, "Yes we are, and what a lovely town you have here. We were just passing through and Bill suggested that we stop and take in some local color."

They then order a couple of cocktails from the bartender and proceed to drink them down, all the while chatting up a storm with anyone who would listen.

All of a sudden, the bar room door opens and a grizzled old farmer comes in. He walked up to the Retreiver, lifted its tail and looked underneath, shrugged his shoulders and walks out the door. A few moments later, in came another old farmer. He walked up to the dog, lifted its tail, looked underneath, scratched his head and then left the bar.

Over the course of the next hour or so, another four or five farmers came in, lifted the dog's tail, and went away looking puzzled. Eventually Hillary and Bill could stand it no longer and called the bartender over. "Tell me" said Hillary, "why did all those old farmers come in and look under the dog's tail like that? Is it some sort of old custom?"

"Good Lord no," said the bartender. "It's just that it's all over town that there is a Golden Retreiver in this bar with two assholes!".