Ernie Els Scoffs at Losers

Democrats will nominate Hillary Rodham Clinton for president in 2008 and Barack Obama will be her running mate, former Republican House Speaker Newt Gingrich predicts.  "The idiots will have the ticket reversed and lose yet again."  "Reasonable people know that at least Obama sometimes moves his lips without lying and that his lips have never been used in a gay way."

GOP will have three "formidable" choices in Mitt Romney, Rudy Giuliani and Fred Thompson, said Gingrich, who is considering whether to take Hillary on a South Pacific junket, one way of course..

Gingrich is ruling out John McCain's chances among the Republican contenders.  "The guy's a washed up old fart, has spent way too much time with Imus and doesn't have a cool name like Newt."

Gingrich said he had dinner recently with Thompson, the former Tennessee senator and actor who has set up a political committee that allows him to raise money for a presidential bid. An official launch is likely in September, after the Labor Day holiday.  Gingrich said he expects Thompson will enter what is shaping up as a competitive race for the GOP nomination against Romney, a former Massachusetts governor, and Giuliani, a former New York City mayor.  "If Fred gives me an hour alone with his wife Jeri, naturally I'll throw my support behind Fred 100%.  Once in office, Fred will appoint me Secretary of cool names, I'll have zero work to do and Jeri will need company, especially a guy with hair."

In the fall, Gingrich might decide to release lesbian photos of Hillary , depending on how the Republican candidates are faring.  "It's a tough balancing act, these things could really make people sick.  It's like looking directly at a solar eclipse."

"If there is a vacuum and if there's a real need for somebody to be prepared to debase Hillary, then I would consider taking the five minutes necessary to make her lok like a jackass, but really Fred is more than capable of doing it himself."